Trouble in Hong Kong

07 Oct, 2026

Storygaming on the OSR discord server!! A Troubleshooters scenario by MTB, GMed by the inimitable Hawkeyes.

Cast:

• Otto Van Racecar, a Romanian rally driver with a gun, a modified 1958 Plymouth Roadrunner, and a wad of cash. Played by me
• Harry Fitzroy, a British intrepid explorer with a bunch of hiking gear. Played by Bubblegum
• Lord Kempton, a British lawyer/doctor with a sword cane. Played by MTB
• Marcel Mercredi, a 16 year old Swiss diplomat and womanizer. Played by Spuk
• Eloise Giraud, a teenaged scientific genius with a chemistry kit. Played by Wierd Writer.

We begin in Kaohsiung, in the Republic of China. A delivery boy comes to our apartment with a wooden box sealed by nails. "Box", he says, and leaves.

The box is addressed to the Honourable Lord Kempton, but the name has been misspelled. It is addressed from Fu Fu Logistics, a company in Hong Kong. Inside: A small Buddha figurine, crudely made and distressed to make it appear older than it really is. And it's hollow.

We pop it open and Eloise does a chemical analysis -- turns out it's pure heroin.

Not moments later, two police officers show up. They say they are in the customs and trade department and are investigating the strictly regulated trade of antiquities. Lord Kempton bluffs them away and the team deliberate upon what to do with the heroin. They decide to enquire about this shipment at the docs.

Otto Van Racecar races against Harry Fitzroy to get there first. Despite driving a modified Plymouth Roadrunner through a variety of street markets and pedestrianaised roads and down several flights of steps, Harry beats him by simply obeying all road laws and following the most efficient directions in his normal sedan car.

Someone has been following them on a scooter. He is a lanky white man, and he declares that HE is Lord Kempton, and he is missing a package. We beat him up and When the real lord Kempton introduces himself, he shouts 'FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK' and he discloses that he was ordered to falsify several addresses and send these 'statues' to them. We call a local police superintendent to come and question him; both Lord Kemptons are to be questioned.

Everything's going well until the cops decide to impound Otto's car. This causes a disastrous chain of events, resulting in the fiery destruction of 1 tow truck, the hospitalisation of 2 police officers, Marcel's prompt marriage to a local air-freight heiress, and the whole gang immediately escaping the Republic of China on a cargo plane.

We touch down in Hong Kong and head to Kowloon, where the heroin had been despatched from. A nice clerk explains that the package had been arranged to be sent via Fu Fu logistics by another company called Fuxiang Trading. The gentleman makes it clera that he is just the middleman, and his sister Elisabeth is a wild child/the one who's packing these statues full of smack.

We insist on meeting this Elisabeth, and the man tries to run. With a dead-eye shot (1 on a 1d100), Otto collapses a vase onto the clerk's head, knocking him out.

Cut to outside Elisabeth's address, the clerk in the car tied up. Eloise burns through the lock with her science kit and the crew interrogates Elisabeth while Otto pulls security. She points the crew to Golden Mao, a Triad boss elsewhere in Hong Kong.

We decide upon a genius plan outside Mao's compound:

1. Eloise synthesises a heroin based drug that makes whoever takes it appear dead.
2. We call the Swiss consulate and tell them Golden Mao has slain Marcel.
3. Marcel hops the compound wall and takes the drug, appearing dead, presumably poisoned by Mao.
4. As British and Swiss authorities arrive, they will find us having a shootout at Mao's front gates; we say we are trying to rescue Marcel.
5. They storm the compound and Mao is killed or arrested.

Otto at the gates.

Eloise and Otto successfully begin a shootout using improvised explosives/fireworks and a revolver. Marcel, however, hops the compound wall only to encounter Golden Mao's wife, a beautiful lady who loves gardening. They get talking and decide to quit the scene in her brand new Mercedes. Harry Fitzroy bravely steps in to fulfil Marcel's role; a British national poisoned by Mao is just as good as a Swiss diplomat.

The authorities arrive, and Otto leads the incursion into Golden Mao's compound, revolver in hand. Harry's catatonic body is taken to the morgue, but Lord Kempton uses red tape to delay Harry's autopsy, while Eloise sneaks in and wakes him up with naloxone. Marcel, quickly outclassed as a 16 year old boy by a fully grown-up crime boss' spouse, puts in a speedy transfer request to the Continent.

Another successful escapade by the Troubleshooters!