Joe B.

Troika Tu(wedn)esday session 2: Mike's Dungeon

Referee: Oldhawkeyes

Players:

A Letter Home

Dear Lydia,

hope everything is well back home. Troika is nice so far, a bit smoggy and loud but my roommates seem like nice people. It's good to have friends in a big city.

We went on a weekend trip the other day. There's usually a special offer going on a barge trip down at the International Barge Port, and today it happened to be 3sp a piece to a place called Mike's Dungeon. DeNiro was pretty excited about exploring another Crystal Sphere, and Theotim kept babbling mathmology stuff to me -- some of it I understood because I use the rudiments in my potion recipes, but the rest went over my head.

The trip was short and uneventful; soon enough we were descending over a vast terrain of verdant trees. We turned up at a cave entrance leading into a small hill.

I was leading the way and we ended up in a room with these dog-sized locusts. They produced a toxic orange mold, so I asked the guys if it was ok to try and harvest them and they were down with it. They had these pretty vicious sharp blades on their hind legs but DeNiro handled it with Pistolet(I might buy some guns and send them back home, Dad would like them). I managed to scoop up a bunch of locust eggs covered in spores.

We kept going after that 'cus the spores were filling up the room and making us gag. Don't worry, we kept well ahead of it and it hasn't had any lasting effects. Monkey Man Dan was worried about his monkeys though and went back to wait at the barge for us. We listened at a door and it sounded like two guys having an argument -- one wanted to shoot an apple off the head of the other. We barged in and there were actually four, all armed and armoured, it got kinda tense. Like that time when we were kids, with the goblins in the berry patch, remember that?

Then Theotim agreed to let one of the guys shoot an apple off of his head. I thought he was crazy! But turns out he pulled some mathmological wizardry and stood in just the right spot so that on a miss, the bolt would ricochet out of a corner and hit the shooter right behind the eyes. BOOM! the shooter went down like a sack of bricks and his friends got all riled up.

DeNiro has this scanner thing that he uses to take notes on aliens or something like that. He started scanning the dead guy and that did NOT go down well, lemme tell you. This one guy starts peacocking at him and tells DeNiro to 'put his dukes up'. Then he throws a punch and DeNiro's scanner doodad took the blow. It was broken! Then Deniro pulled his gun and what do you know, three minutes later all those guys were dead. I scooped up a pretty cool longsword though, I'm getting pretty good at using it, I've been practising. We also found a bunch of money in their pockets which was cool.

Anyways, one of the guys pretty wisely went turncoat and joined us. His name was Cocky Boingboing or something like that. I actually liked him, but we got chased out of there by some magma-spitting toads and he got eaten, sadly. I was gonna ask him to join our tenancy, but oh well.

We got away from the toads after I threw a plasmic core into one of their mouths and the explosion stunned it. Tough frogs! I'd be toast if one of those blew up in my belly!

We were kinda banged up at this point but I ate some of the flapjack Mum made for me. Let her know I said thanks please! If she wants to bake some more and send them with the next letter I wouldn't say no.

We went through one more door and found a couple of scary looking people in armour. I was sure we were gonna be in big trouble because they looked tough, but they just wanted to know wher Cocky Boingboing was because they'd been robbed by him. We told a half-truth and said he was back where we came from, and they went rushing off. Well, they left all their stuff unattended so we just grabbed it and got the hell out of there and back to the barge. We made a bunch of silver that day, all told!

Rent money has been secured, and I managed to turn those eggs (along with some human blood I collected) into a metamorphic potion that turns you into a vile half-bug half-human freak. Maybe I can sell it!

Let me know if there's anything you want me to buy and send home, I'm going to the markets tomorrow.

Miss you all very much. I'll write again next week!

With love,

- Diego